Confession of first world proportions – I’ve never felt like natural resources were finite. Ever. I’ve long had an intellectual cognition that resources are finite, but I’ve never actually felt like anything would surely run out.

Back home in the States, I turn a faucet, and water comes out. It’s been doing that my entire life. The same goes for light switches and power buttons. I flip a switch, and it’s no miracle in my eye when the light turns on; that’s what it’s supposed to do.

I also know that places exist where this is not so. I’ve experienced power outages in other countries, but not quite on the scale that I’m experiencing now. I’m currently living in a place that’s in transition from a village to a well-developed suburb. Whereas before, outages I experienced were temporary, infrequent, and usually supplanted by generator energy, power outages here are frequent and last an indeterminable time. Even as I write this, the power has gone out countless times. Consequently, I’m moving from an intellectual knowledge of resource scarcity to an experiential awareness and it’s having a serious effect on my behavior.

Back home, I’d turn out some lights, and alternate between “long” and “short” showers ostensibly for conservation. But looking back on my actions and attitude, I now realize I was doing this because it’s the right or expected response to “knowing” that resources are finite.

 My have things changed. Seeing the big “bucket” on my rooftop that supplies water to the house is a constant and sure reminder that, I can’t run the water forever. It’s not like my water back home that comes from an invisible, seemingly inexhaustible source, piped in from “never-ending water land.” Thus, my new idea of a “long hot shower” is an 8-minute shower with 2 minutes of too hot, 2.5 minutes of just right, and 3.5 minutes of lukewarm, cooling off water. 

And the electricity… I genuinely feel grateful for every minute of electricity that we have running in this house, because I know at any moment, and on some days most moments, there will be none. When the power supplier has to conserve energy, or the transformers get overwhelmed or whatever the case, there’s nothing I can do about it. As a result even when there is power, when I go to use something requiring electricity, I have an inner debate on whether or not I need it.

I have no idea if these things help with the issue of scarcity, but I behave now as though they do.

 

This is what happens when you start to know with your heart that something is true, rather than solely with your head. Knowing with your head may produce some actions, but additionally knowing with your heart produces a whole different type of feeling and action.

Although I thought I was conservative in the past, today my actions have taken on another level. Today, I’m conserving out of a fuller knowledge and necessity to conserve. And because I’m experiencing finite energy, limited water, etc. everything I learn about conservation means something more to me. I use this knowledge as if my next bath depends on it – because it does. 

As I was thinking about all of this, something hit me – Now just imagine, I’m acting totally different just because I went from head to heart with my knowledge of finiteness of natural resources. What might happen if I actually come into an experiential awareness of the infiniteness of God? I shudder.

But, that too is happening. Certain things thought I knew about God, I’m starting to actually know about God. Honestly, I’m approaching this knowledge with caution. I can’t even imagine how overwhelmed I’ll become when I’m completely washed over by His Glory. Suddenly, I feel like I’m standing on the edge of the ocean watching a wave approach, trying to decide whether I should turn my back and crouch or spread my arms to embrace impact.

“For the Lord Most High is awesome, the great King over all the earth.” Psalm 47:2