Author: Kiki C

Developer and architect exploring the space where humans, systems, and AI meet. I write about code, cognition, and the architecture of intelligent workflows.

Climb Higher

I’ve decided to multi-purpose my personal blog for a little longer commentary on my photo journal. Sometimes it’s not needed. And I happen to like the ability to fill in the blanks with your own imagination. But sometimes, it’s also fun to help your imagination along the way.

I’m not a fan of heights.  I know it’s hard to believe with all of the high flying activity I do, but it’s true.  I often dream of climbing or flying to the top of something and slipping off, or giving up and falling to my death; one so realistic, I wake up every time surprised that I’m alive.

I really want to climb a particular mountain (or 3) but I need to know that I’m not going to reach the end of my climb and throw myself backwards into the abyss.

I’m also a huge fan of fun ways to be physically and mentally fit!

Thus, I’ve started this indoor rock climbing. So far, I haven’t tested the rescue ability of my harness. But my gear is all still pretty new.

Fear is a very important biological response to danger. I have no interest in “conquering my fears.” I’m far from a thrill seeker. I am, however, interested in finding a workable balance between self-control and trust.

That said, I’ve noticed something pretty interesting since starting. When I was being belayed by a partner, I was much more afraid than when I climbed, unharnessed, to the same height. (No more than 12 ft) Strange.

I don’t know. It could just be a newbie thing. But I do hope to climb higher and higher with increasing self-control and trust.

If you’re also a newbie climber and have some tips, stories or photos to share, I’d love to hear them.

Here’s to #climbinghigher!

 

when the charity case was me

One of the best things that has happened to me since embarking on my kingdom journey is encountering a severely limited independence.

No matter what I do, the truth is I’ll never have the level of independence here that I have at home. There are logistical reasons for this, social reasons, environmental reasons and more. As a result, I cannot escape needing people. And I don’t mean needing others as in “gee it would be nice if I had some help with this.” No. I mean needing people in the sense that if someone doesn’t help me, this will not happen. 

It’s been a long long time since I’ve been in that position. But that’s where I am now. And God is totally stretching me.

He’s also showing me the greatest level of provision through community that I could never imagine. There are so many people here who care about me, about each other, and about others – they are hard working missionaries after all. We worship together, pray together, eat, laugh, shop, and entertain together. And we give and receive together. And I don’t know why I’m so surprised about it, but I am. It surprises me to be shown time after time how much they care and how giving they are. I’m not used to it. I feel like I’ve gone back in time to the early church.

The Believers Form a Community

42 All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper[a]), and to prayer.

43 A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. 44 And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. 45 They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. 46 They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity[b]— 47 all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved. (Acts 2:42-47)

It’s has been incredibly rewarding to find myself in a position of need and have so many people willing to help meet those needs. It’s breaking down walls for me. I’m experiencing people in a richer and more positive way. This situation is surely increasing my faith in God’s provision.

That said, my fears associated with receiving have not vanished overnight, nor am I completely free from my desire to operate independently. For example, I can’t just jump in my car and go wherever I want to go in a decently ordered manner. Whenever I leave on my scooter – not car – I have to battle for my life on the truly mean streets of b’lore and If I need to travel beyond 5 km, I need help.  I’ll never love that.

However, I’ve recently noticed that I am more inclined to reach out for help with something, even if it may be possible for me to do it alone. By reaching out to others I’ve found I’m less overwhelmed and I’m more energized for the things I do need take on solo. Not necessarily because I saved energy by working together, but because when God shows His faithful provision, it’s energizing and motivating.

I pray that this is not a lesson I quickly forget when I return to the States.

cheerful giver, fearful receiver

I love giving to others, but when it comes to receiving, I shrivel a bit.  This is because I am exceedingly uncomfortable with receiving. At the root of this discomfort is fear, particularly regarding the following two things.

  1. Fear/Anxiety caused by a feeling of indebtedness. Although I’m comfortable giving to people while expecting nothing in return, and giving to those who I know can’t repay me, I fear being in that same position – receiving from others without the ability to repay. While gratitude comes naturally to me, I wonder if I’ll be able to meet a giver’s expectation of proper gratitude. I fear the consequence of encountering some unreasonable expectation of gratitude; that I’lll walk unwittingly into a debt trap. Related to this is the fear that someone will become resentful towards me after giving because they’ve done so out of compulsion. Even God asks us to be cheerful, not resentful givers. “Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.” (2 Cor 9:7) The idea that my gratitude won’t measure up leaves me feeling inadequate and vulnerable to future “abuse.”
  2. Fear of being in a position of complete dependence on people. I was in a situation years ago, alone in a far away land, dependent on someone to help me coordinate my basic needs, and they failed. I learned to be completely dependent on God in that moment (huge growth), but I started to believe that was the only way to make it; just me and my Lord. Since then I’ve refused to consider the fact that God does indeed put dependable people in our path, and we should faithfully trust in His provision, even (especially) when it comes to the people on whom we depend. Rather than trusting Him in this, I decided I’d rather skip needing a person than to deal with the disappointment or want resulting from an unmet need.

By positioning myself exclusively as a giver (or as the elusive receiver) I’ve been walking gingerly, wearing a cast that should have long been removed. There’s nothing loving about nursing your fears; it’s selfish. We know from Paul’s letter to the church in Corinth that love is not selfish. (1 Cor 13:5)  Furthermore, fear itself is a sign of unperfected love. 1 John 4:18 tells us,  “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” Thus in both having these fears and holding strongly to them, I’ve shown myself as kind of unloving, despite my willingness to give. 

Thank God, living with a close community far far from home has stretched me to the point where I’ve had no choice but to face each of these fears head on.

I’ll show you the ways, after the break.

I thought Chacos were the answer until I discovered this amazing shoe

If you’re planning to go on a mission trip, or any international wandering for that matter, people will try to convince you that the battle of the best walking shoe is between Teva, Chacos, Merrell and the like. This is simply not true. I invite you to broaden your horizon. The most useful shoe I’ve ever taken on a trip is this one.

cole haan flat

Cole Haan Flat for walking. Years of use and abuse in multi-terrained environments. Also a great driving shoe! (see the wear on the driving foot)

  1. It’s good for walking in the city because it blends quite well. You can tell a lot about a foreigner by her shoes, and when I’m walking around in these, they look like any other common flat you’d see downtown.
  2. It’s good in the village because it suddenly dresses down once covered in dust. They just don’t stand out no matter where I have them on. One exception, in the gym. You should wear actual sneakers to any sports activity. Speaking of sneakers…
  3. In case you’re not doing sports but want that comfy sporty feeling, Cole Haan Nike Air technology let’s you wear sneakers without actually wearing sneakers. They are very comfortable and good for walking a lot on paved sidewalks, paved roads, dirt roads, rock paths, tiled floors, carpeted hallways. These are actually YEARS old which only makes them fit more and more like a sock. AND you can also do THIS if you need to.
  4. Closed toe shoes win in dirty environments. Period. If you don’t want animal or human waste on your toes, keep them covered. For example, people spit a lot here. Full hack and snot spit. One girl was walking in her scandals and a man spit directly on her toes…on her skin. Well if you don’t want to have to bleach-burn the flesh off of your foot after coming in contact with such waste, again I say keep them covered.
  5. And in case they come in contact with waste, these come clean with a simple wipe (they might also burn pretty well, in case you’re like me and just refuse). As mine have not yet come in contact with fresh waste (only the dried waste that eventually becomes part of the dirt roads and sidewalks), this perfect shade of brown has allowed me to wear them endlessly and rarely wipe. I think in 3 months of wearing in a dusty dirty muddy part of the world, I’ve wiped them only once.  A clorox wipe, and a couple of lazy swipes later, they’re good as new.
  6. This style/color matches with 95% of the things I’ve packed/purchased. From local ethnic gear to typical western clothes, I’m good. I can wear them with almost any color dress, jeans, leggings, kurtas, dhotis, chitengas…pretty much everything. And think about it, do Tevas ever look nice with a skirt?? NO.  In fact, 9 times out of 10 you just look awkward wearing those other shoes if you try to wear them with anything other than cargo pants.

So next time you pack up for a week in Guatemala or a year in southern Tibet, consider a non-traditional “mission” shoe. Cole Haan has some great walking flats that do the job, sensibly and reasonably fashionable. There may be other brands that are equally or more comfy/stylish. My point in this is to let you know that you don’t have to go with the default recommendation of Teva/Chacos just because you’re going into a “rough” terrain. You can get one shoe that allows you to move in and out of diverse terrains and social situations.

Do you have a favorite shoe that has taken years of abuse and is still holding together? Feel free to suggest if you’d got any tried and true recommendations!

when reality is not working, sometimes i rely on delusion

One habit from my former life that I brought into this one is running. I love running because it gives me time to think. It also gives me space to process some of the craziness that I experience here.

Sometimes, the need arises for me to invent nicer fantasies out of the crazy realities that I’m actually experiencing. Recently, that exact need arose during one of my runs at the local gym.

Delusions At Work – a brief story

From my panoramic view on the treadmill, I watch as a group of “sweepers” surround an elderly lady, who might also be a “sweeper.”  The old lady is sitting in the road at an unmarked bus stop. The others begin pulling, tugging and seemingly harassing her. The group, which is initially made up of only women, begins to grow to include even men. All are tugging, yanking and pulling at this woman, who clearly doesn’t want to be bothered.
I can’t look away as it’s all unfolding in my line of vision. Thus, I create a nicer story in my head. I tell myself, “These people are actually trying to help her. She is sad and ready to give up, but they are literally trying to pick her up and help her stand. Yes, that’s it. They are trying to help her to see that life is worth living and first you have to get up from the middle of the road. ‘You cannot sit here, it’s dangerous, and the bus can hit you,’ they tell her. ‘This is the bus stop.’”

I imagine she’s collapsing all over the ground because she simply can’t fight anymore, except to say she can’t fight. Her old bones fold neatly on the ground as she falls into roughly the same crinkled position every time they pull or tug. She swats and yanks always falling back into the pavement. “That pavement is not really hard. She doesn’t feel it when she falls into it. She actually has special powers and her skin and bones don’t feel any of the bangs or dings. There isn’t any banging or dinging anyway. See she falls so nicely and gracefully into the ground, no matter how much they tug, pull or snatch. Gee, these people are so insistent on her getting up to live. They are insisting upon her moving out of the road and getting on to a good life.”  My story is getting more ridiculous by the minute.

About 40 minutes into my make-believe story a professional looking woman disbands the group. With a fair amount of lively gesturing and speaking, she makes them all leave the old lady alone. She doesn’t move until they move with her, across the road, away from the elderly lady.

At 47 minutes the red-eye dog (pit bull mutt), trots into my line of vision distracting me with his evil look. 5 seconds later I remember the drama across the way and look back to the bus stop and she’s gone! The old lady is gone. I look down the road in both directions. I can see quite a distance away from my vantage point, but I see nothing. She’s gone. “One of her relatives drove here to pick her up and take her home. It’s a close relative, in fact. And she has coffee and biscuits. And they insist that she also stays until lunchtime. The end.”

It’s a strange way to cope, but sometimes a fantasy happy-tale is about all I can manage. And for another day, what’s left of my sanity remains.

Today I nearly lost an epic battle with a cold-blooded reptile

Today I nearly lost an epic battle with a cold-blooded reptile. In fact, the battle is still raging on as I type. How? Well, let me start from the beginning. WARNING: this is totally raw and uncut and freshly pressed and happening RIGHT NOW.

It’s a normal Saturday afternoon here in Bangalore. All seems decent and well. I had just wished my friend a good exam, her final one of UG! She had a lot of papers and crap in her hands so I told her; go on, I’ll close the door for you. As I close the door, THE DESTROYER FELL ON MY HEAD. I thought it was some debris or something, but when I looked at the ground I was face to face with a reptilian monster. A LIZARD.

I screamed, but choked it in. I didn’t want to alarm her as she left. I panicked like crazy. I thought, I have to kill it before it kills me, but how!? I’ve watched others kill them with ease; but I’m not like others. I could sweep him out the door, but if i miss with the broom he’ll climb the broom then jump on my face and oh God No!! Then survival mode kicked in. I ran to the best weapon I know… Clorox cleanup bleach. I’ve killed many spiders with this back home. Now, I know a lizard is far from a spider, but this was all I could do. I thought about using a shoe, but that requires my body to get too close to it. So Clorox cleanup it was. I don’t even remember going to the bathroom to get it. It’s possible I teleported into the bathroom, grabbed the bleach and teleported back in a nanosecond. I really don’t remember letting that thing out of my sight.

With the Clorox I started spraying that monstrosity like I had a mac 10. Then it started running unpredictably. It ran under the door, I sprayed more, and then it ran back in. omg. Wtf. So I’m spraying like a maniac. Then it did something of an unexpected leap. That’s exactly [one of the many things] what I’m scared of!! At that point I’m spraying and I’m like &*!! @!#@! And it ran under the shoe cabinet. It appeared to slow down, but it didn’t die. Then I’m flashbacking all these things people have been telling me about lizards. “If it touches you, you’ll be poisoned.” “All girls have to learn how to kill them else it will kill you.” “It will drop its tail and pretend to be dead.” I didn’t see the tail dropped, just the stupid lizard wagging around. At this point, I’d bleached pretty much everything in the room trying to kill this sucker. But now we were having a standoff. “It needs more bleach,” I thought. With a clear view under the cabinet, I sprayed more. Lizard runs out, I’m still spraying. Then it takes cover under the vase. I’m thinking, man this thing has to die. It’s him, or me and I can’t go out like this.

I devise a new plan. I’ll freeze it. I turned on the AC blasting. But then I thought to myself, if he gets cold enough, he might run into my room instead, looking for cover. Then I’m really toast. Then I thought I’d burn it. So I fill the teakettle with water and I watch to make sure he doesn’t move. Sneaky thing.

Finally the water is done and I fill up a mug ready to douse this fool. But I realize, again, it requires me to be way too close and his moves can be unpredictable and I’m already dropping this water everywhere making a mess with my trembling hands. Leave it. So I put the mug on the table and go back to plan A. Spray on that fool. And I’m spraying again, about to bleach the brakes off of this thing! And this time it moved slower. Like it might be ready to give up and die.

As I sit here, I’m still watching it. He could be faking a slow death, and I can’t risk him trying to sneak me later.  I don’t have anywhere to be for the next 3 hours. I can wait. No problem. You move, and you’re getting sprayed. As I said, the battle is still on. I’m typing, but I’m watching you.

Secondary problem here will be to clean up all this bleach everywhere before I give myself inhalation poison trying to kill him. 

the destroyer under the vase

the destroyer under the vase

Oh, you don’t see him?? He’s right here!

Image

And after his final bleaching…. he’s here. And this is what my eyes are affixed to now. 

Image

 

LORD HAVE MERCY! REMEMBER YOU SAID GOOD THINGS FOR ME. GOOD THINGS! 

Two weeks ago I thought raising money for RACE’s next installment was impossible

Two weeks ago, raising 134k for the RACE project’s next installment seemed next to impossible, only possible by God’s miracle.

Today we have 136k to pay the installment.

Funny I should say, “only possible by God’s miracle.” I don’t think it’s a big task for God by any means. I don’t imagine even one drop of sweat beading on His brow to make it happen.

And yet, I think it’s a pretty big deal. Less because of God’s obvious capability, and more because I’m experiencing growing pains in letting go of the god of my superstitions.

I have a hard time coming to grips with my doubts. I’m realizing that I expect to find disappointment in God’s Will for me. Because I seem to never know when or if my needs or desires align with God’s will, it’s a lot easier for me to accept disappointment while cautiously embracing happiness. Although I know His will to be good and perfect, I believe that in my imperfection, I’ll rarely pray for the “right things at the right time.”

Whether I’m praying to find lost keys, (maybe God is teaching me a lesson in being more organized) or asking Him to provide funds for the rescue home, I’m equally unsure if His will is “Of course I’ll provide that” or “wrong prayer, try again.”

I read something interesting recently about how people become comfortable with an unfriendly God, “who keeps them in their place by ensuring their continued distress.” Comfortable with that!

But when I look at my life, He hasn’t treated me that way at all. Only because of the uncertainty on whether my desires align with God’s do I approach life with this ridiculous caution.  This attitude is totally against Jesus’ teaching. In Matthew, Jesus is recorded as saying,

“You parents – if your children ask for a loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you give them a snake? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him.” Matthew 7:9-11

There’s a huge truth in this scripture. God wants good for us, and He doesn’t have some twisted idea of what is good. It’s not God’s will to give us a snake when we ask for a fish, not even to “teach a lesson.”

Another truth from the Bible is found in Paul’s letter to the Hebrews where he writes,

“And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.” Hebrews 11:6

I don’t have to expect “bad things” so I can spin-doctor it into a good lesson from God because the Bible teaches us that He will reward us, and He will give us good gifts when we seek Him and ask. One way I can increase assurance that I’m seeking God’s will is to seek Him more and grow in my relationship through prayer and embracing the truths of Scripture. Because it’s there that we find His good will toward us written in the Blood of the Lamb.

I don’t have to cautiously accept good things as if God hasn’t actually meant it for me. I have to start acknowledging God’s specific goodness to me. As free as I feel to acknowledge the lessons, struggles, challenges etc. as blessings, I should feel equally free accept the things that make me happy, the deep fulfillment I get in serving, and even the “smallest” details He’s orchestrated that bring me joy. Not simply for the sake of my joy, but for His Glory that I might delight in it.

God blessed the RACE project beyond what was needed for the current installment. I have to believe that with prayer, He will bless with everything needed for the final installment as well.

Confession of first world proportions

Confession of first world proportions – I’ve never felt like natural resources were finite. Ever. I’ve long had an intellectual cognition that resources are finite, but I’ve never actually felt like anything would surely run out.

Back home in the States, I turn a faucet, and water comes out. It’s been doing that my entire life. The same goes for light switches and power buttons. I flip a switch, and it’s no miracle in my eye when the light turns on; that’s what it’s supposed to do.

I also know that places exist where this is not so. I’ve experienced power outages in other countries, but not quite on the scale that I’m experiencing now. I’m currently living in a place that’s in transition from a village to a well-developed suburb. Whereas before, outages I experienced were temporary, infrequent, and usually supplanted by generator energy, power outages here are frequent and last an indeterminable time. Even as I write this, the power has gone out countless times. Consequently, I’m moving from an intellectual knowledge of resource scarcity to an experiential awareness and it’s having a serious effect on my behavior.

Back home, I’d turn out some lights, and alternate between “long” and “short” showers ostensibly for conservation. But looking back on my actions and attitude, I now realize I was doing this because it’s the right or expected response to “knowing” that resources are finite.

 My have things changed. Seeing the big “bucket” on my rooftop that supplies water to the house is a constant and sure reminder that, I can’t run the water forever. It’s not like my water back home that comes from an invisible, seemingly inexhaustible source, piped in from “never-ending water land.” Thus, my new idea of a “long hot shower” is an 8-minute shower with 2 minutes of too hot, 2.5 minutes of just right, and 3.5 minutes of lukewarm, cooling off water. 

And the electricity… I genuinely feel grateful for every minute of electricity that we have running in this house, because I know at any moment, and on some days most moments, there will be none. When the power supplier has to conserve energy, or the transformers get overwhelmed or whatever the case, there’s nothing I can do about it. As a result even when there is power, when I go to use something requiring electricity, I have an inner debate on whether or not I need it.

I have no idea if these things help with the issue of scarcity, but I behave now as though they do.

 

This is what happens when you start to know with your heart that something is true, rather than solely with your head. Knowing with your head may produce some actions, but additionally knowing with your heart produces a whole different type of feeling and action.

Although I thought I was conservative in the past, today my actions have taken on another level. Today, I’m conserving out of a fuller knowledge and necessity to conserve. And because I’m experiencing finite energy, limited water, etc. everything I learn about conservation means something more to me. I use this knowledge as if my next bath depends on it – because it does. 

As I was thinking about all of this, something hit me – Now just imagine, I’m acting totally different just because I went from head to heart with my knowledge of finiteness of natural resources. What might happen if I actually come into an experiential awareness of the infiniteness of God? I shudder.

But, that too is happening. Certain things thought I knew about God, I’m starting to actually know about God. Honestly, I’m approaching this knowledge with caution. I can’t even imagine how overwhelmed I’ll become when I’m completely washed over by His Glory. Suddenly, I feel like I’m standing on the edge of the ocean watching a wave approach, trying to decide whether I should turn my back and crouch or spread my arms to embrace impact.

“For the Lord Most High is awesome, the great King over all the earth.” Psalm 47:2

Why I left the World Race

There’s absolutely no drama here. If you’re looking for me to say I discovered it was really Hogwart’s school of sorcery, you wont find it. That’s only partially true. (I kid…) I have zero regrets for going. I’m still all about kingdom journeys and my WR experience was a great step in the right direction.

If you haven’t read part 1 – “Why I joined World Race” you might want to refer briefly to that. In summary, I joined WR largely in part for logistics and Christian community, the most important of those being Christian community.

First, how might I describe a Christian community? One way would be as Christ-centered, Spirit-lead community that draws its strength to love God and people from a foundation based in Truth. I find it difficult to believe this can be had apart from Bible-centeredness. By Bible-centeredness, I mean strengthening our foundation of truth by consistently pouring over, discovering, and understanding the word.

The Bible is clear about the value of God’s word and its essence as truth. Scripture says, “The sum of your word is truth…” (Psalm 119:160) The Psalmist knows he can make no moves without this truth saying in all earnest, “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.” (Psalm 119:105) He cries to the Lord, “Send out your light and your truth; let them guide me.” (Psalm 43:3a)

And as if to answer this plea with the ultimate guidance and essence of word and truth, “… the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth.” (John 1:14) In His own words, Christ says to us, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life.” (John 14:6)

And as we proclaim to be followers of Christ, Christ-centered, and working on His behalf, everything we do should be rooted in truth, in the word, in Christ.

Prayer – The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. (Psalm 145:18)

Worship – God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth. (John 4:24)

Loving and Serving – Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and truth. (1 John 3:18)

The lives and love we pour into others will ultimately be a reflection of that which we fill up on through our Spirit-lead discovery of God’s word. I don’t mean to say that apart from being a theologian with degrees in exegetical studies one cannot properly love; however, our affinity for the word should be like the great Psalmist who proclaimed, “How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth!” For without such an affinity, our capacity to love cannot begin to breech its truest potential.

How does this relate to my experience with WR community? First of all, the WR is not anti-Bible. People are kind-hearted and love God. I even experienced people who are passionate about the Word and thirst to enrich their relationship with God through this. However (my experience) the greater community culture lacked urgency for incorporating deep discovery of the Word into our God experience. A Christ-centered community must value studying and sharpening each other in God’s Word as much as do-gooding, spectacular views, smiling children and great cappuccino. (All of which I thoroughly enjoyed FTR!) If we believe that God’s Word is Living Word, we should feel it, experience it, and approach it with the same awe and wonder as the other amazing gifts God has given us in His creation.

That’s the kind of community I thought I was joining; a balanced group who understood the value of experience, and love and everything being rooted and grounded in the Truth of God’s Word.

Fortunately, the Kingdom Journey continues!

(BTW, I started this as a 2-part, but it might become more of a mini series. There’s a lot. No drama; just … a lot…like disease and pestilence and stuff)

It’s all fun and games until you can’t pay the rent

Booming economy is often welcome, especially in developing nations. But when consumerism crashes head-on with necessary social change, things get … tricky.

It’s no secret, Indian economy is booming, especially in major hubs, like the IT hub Bangalore. 5 years ago there were maybe 1 or 2 malls in this city. Today, there are more malls than I can count.

The rapid expansion and high end development here wows me at every turn. But this development boom comes at a price tag, one that we don’t often see up front. When land starts being developed commercially, residences come up all around to house the demographic these high-end commercial outlets cater to.

On the good side, I love that I can hit a MAC store and Apple store in the same shopping center. But at a closer look, the resulting gentrification is rampant. And it’s all fun and games until you can’t pay the rent. Gentrification doesn’t affect only people, but also grassroots organizations and NPO’s with limited funding.

And here’s where it gets personal.

The RACE organization I work with (Rescue and Care for victims of sexual slavery) is purchasing land to build a permanent home for their mission. Since they started paying on the land, the value has appreciated exceedingly more than expected. This is due to the area becoming a new hotspot for developers. The landowner (not actually RACE yet) stands to make much more selling the land to a developer today. If only he could take the land back and cancel the selling agreement.

But wait! Maybe he can! 

This NPO grassroots organization with limited funds is making gradual payments. The next installment of $124,000 is due in 10 days. This time, the organization is $75,000 short. This represents a huge opportunity for Mister Owner.

You see, if this payment is missed then he has stipulated that he would increase the total price of the land in the form of a late payment penalty to an amount that the organization can’t afford. RACE would have to give up the land, and the owner knows this. The organization would not only lose the land, but all the money invested in this land project to date. A very big deal.

I can understand from the neighborhood’s viewpoint, it would be great if more shops were built, bringing jobs or new housing. But why does it seem like consumerism always wins?

It’s frustrating because, I’m a consumer. I’m as much a part of that problem as anyone else. 

But some things outweigh my need for convenient places to spend money on things I don’t actually need. One such thing is my need for women and children to NOT be a part of the marketplace of things people conveniently consume.

Human trafficking is one more form of consumerism.

Human trafficking is a booming business.

Brothers, sisters, daughters, mothers and sons are being sold.

But what can we do?? 

We’ll pray. Tomorrow the RACE org will go to the land and pray.

We’ll call on our friends, family, and associates, anyone who will support us through donations.

And I don’t know what will happen. 

Only God knows how this story ends.

I know I’m supposed to say, oh God’s will… and He will make miracles… and things like that. 

But honestly, it’s difficult to fight the feeling that consumerism will edge out the victory. 

So I’m throwing up my hands. 

Not in defeat, but rather in prayer reaching out to God.

Lord Jesus, we have 10 days.

There will be more on my work with the RACE project later. For now, if you feel like there’s value in providing a permanent holistic care center and home for women and children rescued from sexual slavery please donate.

 

 http://www.gofundme.com/rescue-and-care

http://www.rescueandcare.org